Why have a funeral?
When asked what my favourite type of ceremony is I usually reply, funerals. Mostly people are surprised at this answer, but a ‘good’ funeral is something very special.
Personally, I think that to say good bye to someone who has died is important, a form of courtesy. As well as saying good bye funerals also provide a space to acknowledge that someone has died, to bring ourselves together in community to share our grief and to celebrate that person. It is a chance to reflect on the meaning of life and death and to welcome the continuity of life for those remaining. And the stories that we get to share … part of our history, unknown aspects of a full life, dreams realised and dreams that will go unrealised.
Of course, there are many ways, private and public, that we can do this and a variety of ways that I, as a Celebrant, can be of support.
Funeral Service: The most common way is to be the Celebrant at a funeral, working with the family and the funeral company.
Pre-planning: is becoming more common and with my experience I can partner you to leave a framework of requests and ideas for your funeral. Often these include favourite songs or readings but may include personal reflections on dying and death. Many leave room for those planning their funeral to have input as well.
Behind the scenes: On occasion I have worked behind the scenes to help design a ceremony that is then delivered by a friend or family member, with me in attendance just in case I am needed. For example, a granddaughter was very keen to do her grandmother’s funeral but was nervous about what was needed and how she might be on the day emotionally. We worked together before hand and designed who would do which sections of the funeral. This worked well with the granddaughter having the ‘lead’ role.